Attitude of Gratitude

Gratitude is a topic we often discuss, but it’s one that deserves to be revisited as often as possible. After my brain injury, I found myself in a serious slump. Everything you might imagine—and perhaps even experienced yourself—seemed to relentlessly close in on me. I was spiraling into a dark mental space.

Counseling is a standard part of recovery after a brain injury, and I was fortunate to choose the priest who had visited me daily while I was in the ICU/CCU to be my counselor. During one session, I opened up about my struggles: I wasn’t allowed to drive. Walking was a challenge. Using my right arm felt impossible. My face, left shoulder, and left wrist were still wrecked from repeated falls. I spent my days dulled by painkillers and Propranolol. To top it off, the city was pushing me to take medical retirement. Life felt unbearable, and I couldn’t see a way forward.

He listened carefully and then posed a question that stopped me in my tracks: “What if this is it? What if this is the best you’re ever going to be from this point forward?” I responded sarcastically, thanking him for his “helpful” encouragement. But he wasn’t deterred.

“I am being helpful,” he said. “You need to look the worst-case scenario squarely in the face and make a decision. Do you curl up in a ball and cry, or do you decide to be incredibly grateful for life and start living as if you were given a gift you can never repay? The doctors and nurses worked tirelessly to save you, and after the event, they cared for you around the clock. Let’s start there with your list of things to be grateful for.”

He then gave me an assignment: write down 10 things I was grateful for in that moment. We created the list together in his office on a legal notepad. Once we finished, he tore out the page and handed it to me. “Take this home,” he said, “and tape it up somewhere prominent—somewhere you’ll see it every day, multiple times a day.”

I made two copies: one for my refrigerator door and one for my bathroom mirror. Each day, multiple times a day, I was reminded to focus on gratitude. This simple exercise had a profound impact on my mental state. It shifted my focus from what I had lost to what I still had.

Some of the things I listed may seem trivial now, but at the time, they were game changers. If you’ve never done this exercise, I encourage you to try it. And if you have done it but it’s been a while, there’s no better time than today to do it again. Gratitude has the power to transform our perspective, no matter where we find ourselves in life.